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Oke,
here it is. You know, i think that some men are weird. I don’t mean that they
are kind of lost of thinking or doing the freak actions, but i talk about how
they treat the girls. Sometimes i think that all of them just kind of bad boys
that always play on the girls’s holy hearts, but sometimes i feel that they are
loving and caring, and trusted. He is the one. A man that i just knew a few
months ago. Well, he is not bastard actually (but one of candidates perhaps). He
is kind, polite, funny, i could say he is also smart and... yeah,,, handsome based
on what my friends’s saying. What i am saying,,, Eehmm,,, quite handsome i think.
Good enough to take him arround to be introduced in the reunions.
At
the begining, he acted like he was
interested of me, or the other words, he was falling in love with me at the
first sight. Well, i had had many times the thing like this. it’s been a
usual, that’s why i was not responding well. Yeah you know, men are the visual
creatures. That’s why girls, dont’t over reacted for the love that comes to you
at first sight. I did realized that he wanted to get close and know me more. He
cared to me. He tried to make me feel cozy with him. At that time, like i said
before, i didn’t respond like he wanted.
To be together i mean, building a realationship, i didn’t want it.
Because
there was someone else that i loved, that i wanted with. When i was with this “someone
else”, i knew he was down. Ohh yeah,, i really saw The Broken Heart Face. Kind
of the pieces of broken miror that i have to collect. But the other thing that i
knew, he let me go with my “someone else”, perhaps because he saw me that i was
happy. unfortunately it didn't last long. We got broken for a rediclous reason.
Bastard!.
As
time goes by,, he came to get close with me again. Even he got more attractive
than i’d known him before. He clearly showed me that he loved me (eventhough he
still hasn’t tell me). Saying that he missed me, he gave me some sweet words, took
care of me, And i deeply felt that i was
wanted. Finally i feltl that i got in touch in my heart. I started to give him a
chance to get close with me. The real close. I gave him many good responds. And
i started thinking that i loved him.
And
here is the weird thing happens. I feel like he becomes so clumsy, lame and geeky.
Ugghh... i know well that waiting is one of girls principles of love. And i do.
Because i want to keep my classy girl. But he is so slow on progress. Sometimes
we run like a couples but he hasn’t given me the tittle. I want the official
dating, the commitment, the real relationship. Arghh,, like i said before, he
even hasn’t said the “love” to me. He makes me feel confused. And it’s already
two weeks he hasn’t call me or text me. Is this the end? Is he just playing on
me? does he give up of me? or Did i make a mistake?.
I’m
thinking hardly what i have to do. I’m thinking that might be there is
something that makes him doubt of me, Kind of difficult to hold me, to be with me, to have me.
What is it? And why? Why he becomes like this when i am so sure. It feels like
i have missed something that i don’t realize. Kind of a requirement. The thing
that he’s still thinking to make a decision about me. Or might be i also have
to consider about him again. does he deserve to have my love? A man like him,
The weird one.
Well,
if there is anyone that reads my lament,, please give me some enlightenment
what i need to do. Do you ever have experience like this? talk to me please. I’d like to say thank you
before. J
